Wednesday, August 10, 2005


Old age: A great sense of calm and freedom.When the passions have relaxed their hold,you may have escaped, not from one master but from many. ~ Plato
Today is my mother's birthday, and as she is entering old age (not really old age, she'd kill me), she seems to have mastered escaping the things that used to master her. I guess life is just kind of like that, where you sometimes have to dance to someone else's tune. Early in life, it's usually parents, teachers or the first boy you think you really love - this time. Middle years, it becomes bosses, society, children and husbands. Later in life, it may be life long friends, STILL husbands and perhaps family ties that are too hard to break free from. But as you advance in years, they no longer have to master any part of your life.
I battle my mother sometimes on her choices, but I do have to admire her for doing what she wants. As Plato said, she has a great sense of calm and freedom. I guess that might come from getting older and knowing what she wants. Or from having made poor choices in the past, leaving her feeling frustrated or angry at herself for not following her instinct. Or maybe, it just came from dealing with so much shit in so many areas, she just chose not to take it anymore. Either way, she has freedom.
And I wouldn't necessarily say her passions have relaxed their hold. I would say they have taken another form. Instead of spreading herself out over many who don't matter, she concentrates on the few who do. Her husband, her children, her steadfast friends and her three grandsons. These people fill her life. These people are her passion. They are what she cares about most. (Well...them, and some good linguine on Sunday.)
They are also the ones who get to bask in all that is wonderful about her. Her loyalty, love, laughter and kindness. Her phenomenal ability to listen and make you feel special. Her insight and wisdom that comes from years of experience and pages of reading material. Her willingness to ALWAYS be there when you need her, even when sometimes you (me) haven't always been so nice.

Today is my mother's birthday. I wish her many more years of reveling in all that she has become and all that she is every day to each of us who know her and love her. 
Happy Birthday, Mommy.


Anonymous said...

Salena - I am lucky to know your "Mommy" and know it. Also feel lucky to know you through her. Spent some time with her yesterday and agree that she is more calm and focused on what is most important to her - you are on her mind and heart! Thanks for your blog! Doris

Darcy said...

You know, I sometimes wonder how on earth will I ever be something as great as a mother? It never ceases to amaze me how much a woman can love her child, and how powerful that love is, in every way, shape, and form.