Thursday, May 19, 2005

Texas Pride?

I don't get it....seriously, I don't. What is the DEAL with people who have this bigger than life, Texas Pride??

I have been almost all over the United States and I have to say, I don't see where the pride for Texas comes in. Is it the sheer mass of land that the state occupies? Because if that's it, you people can HAVE it.

I've been to smaller states....one of the smallest, in fact - Rhode Island. This state, in it's teeny tiny scrap of land, offers more bang for the emotional buck in my opinion.

So you got a whole lotta land - and what do you have to show for it? Let's see...

West Texas is a WASTELAND...can't believe anyone would even LIVE there.

Northern Texas has what, Wichita Falls and Amarillo? Which, if you recall, smells like cow shit.

Southern Texas has Corpus Christi and Brownsville....I can think of better places to see the Gulf of Mexico.

Eastern Texas has Texarkana....which gets it's name from a combination of Texas and Arkansas - who thought up THAT brilliant combination? Two crap states does not one good one make.

The Alamo? What's to remember?

And the Big D? They have the Reunion Tower - yeah, the 50 ft. big ball structure that was built for a World Fair? And the Dallas Cowboys? Please. The only good thing about Dallas is DFW airport, which gives you a break from flying on most cross country flights.

And the heat. OH. MY. GOD. The heat.

Did I say OH. MY. GOD. the heat?

I could never live here. EVER. Which is good, cause they'd probably run me out anyway.

Then again, that might not be so bad.

1 comment:

vicissitudinaire said...

Ha. I use to live in Houston, and I can attest to everything you wrote. It was hot, it was humid, it was nasty. Oh, and the mosquitos were monsters. There were Sam Houston statues everywhere in TX, and all Texas flags and no US flags.

The Texans really want to be a country :-D