You Couldn't Pay Me Enough

I don't think there is any compensation that would be great enough for me to wear any of these things to do a job.

1. Any sort of "costume" type of uniform: Like the kind of Swiss Miss uniform you might find if you worked at a Dutch pancake house, or that striped yellow, red and blue uniform they wear at Hot Dog On A Stick or even something as basic as suspenders (with all those buttons and crap on them) like the kind you see on the people at T.G.I. Friday's. I could never be that "peppy" for a job.

2. Heels and a hard hat (unless Eddie asked me to!)

3. Cleats

4. Rubber gloves (There are too many disgusting reasons these may be needed....I don't even want to think about it.)

5. A paper hat or a hair net

6. Orange shorts, pantyhose and white scrunchie socks (didn't those socks go out of style in 1985?)

7. A referee uniform (unless I actually was a referee)

8. Knee Pads

9. Anything made of asbestos

10. Pasties (again, unless Eddie asked)