Monday, April 09, 2012


"Tim Robbins was in it." my mother said.

"Yeah, the one with the girl that was murdered at the beginning." I said. "Mystic River."

"And Kevin Bacon..." she said.

"Right, and the boys were molested or something when they were young." I said. "By a priest, I think."

"No, it was a cop." she said.

"Well, whatever. It was Mystic River." I said.

"No, that's not it." my mother said, convinced I was wrong.

"Yes, there was that one scene where the boy was looking back, out of the car window as it drove away. Remember? I'm telling you, it's Mystic River." I said.

"No. Sean Penn was in it." she said.

"I think you guys are talking about two different movies." my brother said.

"No, we're talking about the same one." I said.

"I don't think so." my brother said, unconvinced.

After a few minutes of silence, my mother blurted out, "Mystic River! That's the name of it."

"I just said that!" I said.

"When?" she said.

"Ma. Seriously?? I just said it THREE times." I said.

"I thought you said Mr. Criver." she said.

My brother and I looked at her like she was crazy.

"You thought I said Mr. Criver?" I said.

"Yeah." she said.


"Yes." she said.

"OK, so when you heard "Mr. Criver" three times, didn't you search your brain and know that there's not a movie called Mr. Criver and maybe I was saying MISS-TIC River?" I said.

"Well, no." she said. "I was too busy trying to figure out who Mr. Criver was."

And that is pretty much how most holiday gatherings go with my family.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Zumba In My Dreams
2 YEARS AGO: Eddie Peep Show Friday
3 YEARS AGO: Some Like It Hot
4 YEARS AGO: The Desert Blooms With Irritants
5 YEARS AGO: Squeeze Me?
6 YEARS AGO: Relationship Deal Breakers


Gi-Gi Roxx said...

The posts like this are some of my favorite. Does you mother know how much entertainment she provides us? Brilliant.

Anonymous said...

Late to the party, but I just wanted to say - I had this exact same exchange with my own mother. She asked me how I liked "Mister Criver" and I said, "I think you are thinking about Goodbye Mr. Chips", and she said no, "MISTAHC RIVAH." Thank you for posting your funny story. I found you when I googled Mister Criver.

The Daily Rant said...

GIGI: I don't know why I never responded to you, but I'm not sure that she's truly aware of her entertainment value. :)

ANONYMOUS: OMG, so I'm not the only one on the planet with a mother like this?? LOL Your mother sounds pretty damn funny too! :)