Monday, April 09, 2012


"Tim Robbins was in it." my mother said.

"Yeah, the one with the girl that was murdered at the beginning." I said. "Mystic River."

"And Kevin Bacon..." she said.

"Right, and the boys were molested or something when they were young." I said. "By a priest, I think."

"No, it was a cop." she said.

"Well, whatever. It was Mystic River." I said.

"No, that's not it." my mother said, convinced I was wrong.

"Yes, there was that one scene where the boy was looking back, out of the car window as it drove away. Remember? I'm telling you, it's Mystic River." I said.

"No. Sean Penn was in it." she said.

"I think you guys are talking about two different movies." my brother said.

"No, we're talking about the same one." I said.

"I don't think so." my brother said, unconvinced.

After a few minutes of silence, my mother blurted out, "Mystic River! That's the name of it."

"I just said that!" I said.

"When?" she said.

"Ma. Seriously?? I just said it THREE times." I said.

"I thought you said Mr. Criver." she said.

My brother and I looked at her like she was crazy.

"You thought I said Mr. Criver?" I said.

"Yeah." she said.


"Yes." she said.

"OK, so when you heard "Mr. Criver" three times, didn't you search your brain and know that there's not a movie called Mr. Criver and maybe I was saying MISS-TIC River?" I said.

"Well, no." she said. "I was too busy trying to figure out who Mr. Criver was."

And that is pretty much how most holiday gatherings go with my family.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Zumba In My Dreams
2 YEARS AGO: Eddie Peep Show Friday
3 YEARS AGO: Some Like It Hot
4 YEARS AGO: The Desert Blooms With Irritants
5 YEARS AGO: Squeeze Me?
6 YEARS AGO: Relationship Deal Breakers


Angela said...

The posts like this are some of my favorite. Does you mother know how much entertainment she provides us? Brilliant.

Anonymous said...

Late to the party, but I just wanted to say - I had this exact same exchange with my own mother. She asked me how I liked "Mister Criver" and I said, "I think you are thinking about Goodbye Mr. Chips", and she said no, "MISTAHC RIVAH." Thank you for posting your funny story. I found you when I googled Mister Criver.

The Daily Rant said...

GIGI: I don't know why I never responded to you, but I'm not sure that she's truly aware of her entertainment value. :)

ANONYMOUS: OMG, so I'm not the only one on the planet with a mother like this?? LOL Your mother sounds pretty damn funny too! :)