Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Shopping In Hell

Today I ran to the store to do a little last minute shopping because I had to pick up a gift for my friend's kids. Let me tell you how traumatized I am shopping for kids. I wandered around the toy department in a daze. I didn't even feel like I was in my own body. My eyes were glazed over, my head felt foggy and as I was shuffling my feet, twirling around, looking at all of the choices, I felt my chest tightening as well. It is sheer torture.

I hate shopping in general, but Christmas shopping has got to be the worst. I like to get in and get out. That's my shopping M.O. I thought I was going to have to shove a pencil in my eye shopping with my mother yesterday. She had a list, but she had to look at every single thing that wasn't on the list before she actually put the listed items into her basket. I was done, wandering behind her with my items snugly in the cart, that I was hanging on to with white knuckles just to keep my hands occupied so I wouldn't snap her neck. I will never go to the store with her again.

After I was done with the death shop today, I came home to check the weather for the next few days. Why, you ask? Because I am a freaking masochist, that's why. I should just take the blade to my wrist right now, because THIS is what the next seven days looks like. Do you see Christmas Day? 75 Degrees. SEVENTY FIVE!!! In December! This is the local news forecast...can you imagine that The Weather Channel has each day at least three degrees hotter? OMG.

There is some serious global shit going on people and I don't like it one bit. At the rate this is happening, there isn't going to be a place on earth I can go to get away from the heat.

I really have to reconsider my holiday plans next year. I don't think I can bear having another holiday wearing shorts and flip-flops or shopping in stores that require you to disrobe before entering because they have the heat set on incinerate. Just because it's "winter" here, does not mean you have to put the heat on. If it's seventy five outside, it does not have to be eighty five inside. Even more disturbing are the people wearing turtlenecks, sweaters, scarves and coats. WTF??


MamaKBear said...

I would LOVE to have those kinda temps all year round.

Right now in OKC it is 27 degrees and it just finished snowing. Bleh.

Becky G said...

Welcome to my world. I grew up in the South and have never in my life seen a white Christmas. But you know what? It's still Christmas, even down here where the snow don't blow. Heck it could be worse. You could be in Australia where they have Christmas in the SUMMER!

Twisted Cinderella said...

I was like that shopping yesterday! It was hell knowing I had to do everything Christmas in one day. UGH!!

Anonymous said...

Thank God, I live in Tucson and can enjoy the 75 degrees, I DO NOT miss the snow one bit.

lime said...

we've barely gotten out of the teens and single digits the last week or so. wnan come to the poconos?