The Infinite Wisdom Of A Grandfather

My Aunt was telling me a story the other day about how her son was trying to scurry around last Sunday to get his girlfriend back home after she had spent the weekend with him. She inquired as to why he was rushing her home and he gave her the vague answer of, "I got things to do."

Turns out the "thing" he had to do was watch football.

My Aunt, in her innate understanding of her son, gave a response laced with humor by saying, "Oh, so you got a little sex, now you're ready to watch football, eh? That reminds me of something your grandfather used to say: 'After sex, women should turn into something useful; like a chair.'"

I had to smile hearing that. It reminded me of how my grandfather always had something colorful to say and usually didn't pull any punches when offering his opinion or assessment of a situation.

I guess he learned early on, after having four girls, that he had to get right to the point or he might lose his audience in the flurry of taking turns in the bathroom, bickering with their sisters, fighting over boys and getting ready for dates.

I'm going to pick out my upholstery pattern now; see you all in the furniture showroom!