Monday, November 23, 2015

Annoying People For Eight Hundred, Alex

Ed and I love to watch Jeopardy!  It's fun and it makes me realize, simultaneously, how much I know, and how much I don't know.  I'm a genius for a minute and then I'm like, "This stuff happened in the world?  How did I not know about that?"

Today I almost couldn't finish watching the show - and it's only 30 minutes long - because of contestant Laura Ashby, a lawyer from Atlanta. Laura, known on Twitter as #JeopardyLaura, has such an incredibly annoying affectation to her voice, she was almost unwatchable.

I found this video of her performance. It's short, but you can definitely hear her dragging out the last letter of the word. She did it with numbers too, "Cake Design, one thousaaaaaaaaaand."

She did this throughout the entire show. See another short compilation of video clips here.

I went online to find more about her and found that not only were other people commenting on her voice, but there's a Reddit page of people who hate it.  Apparently, this is her second appearance on the show and regular watchers were rooting for her to lose just so they wouldn't have to listen to her on another episode.  So much for that.

This woman is a lawyer.  She went to Yale. I'm sure she's very smart, but I couldn't imagine having to work with her or argue a case against her. I really think I'd have to leave the job if I had to listen to her all day.  I just couldn't do it.

I actually thought she sounded very much like Jill Abramson, the former Executive Editor of the New York Times, who I heard being interviewed a few years ago on Alec Baldwin's show, Here's The Thing.  I almost couldn't get through the interview because of her voice, but at the same time it interested me and repelled me, so I had to keep listening. If she was doing it to distract or annoy, it was working.

Laura's voice has an air of pretension to it, like AAbramson's but she didn't do it all the time, which was odd.  If it's there, it should be there all the time. It's rich girl mixed with valley girl. Uptalk and Vocal Fry. It's not southern as we know Atlanta to be, but it's definitely affectation, maybe from her Yale days. I honestly couldn't imagine being her friend or married to her (she is actually married) and this manner of speaking not bothering me. Of course, as my grandfather used to say, "There's an ass for every seat." I'm sure I am just annoying to some people as she is to me.

Except I couldn't be.  Could I?  No.  Please tell me I'm not. Wait...I'm asking Ed right now.

Anyway, while I was watching, I tweeted. And it was probably my most awesome Tweet ever as far as likes and retweets go.  I got a celebrity retweet!!  OK, so it came from Ellen Cleghorne, an SNL cast member from the early nineties, but still.

As soon as I saw the name, I knew it was someone famous.  It rang a bell but I couldn't place her.  So I Googled her and as soon as I saw her face, I knew exactly who it was. The chick from Saturday Night Live!

The worst thing about this episode?  I can't unhear #JeopardyLaura's voice. In fact, I'm talking like her right nowwww.  Ed is getting annoyed. I keep playing the clip, too.  It's like a bad accident, I can't look away. And I just keep imagining her at her day job, being a lawyer, annoying the court.

As I typed that, I just had a thought.  If you're a Serial fan, she might even remind you a little of Adnan Syed's lawyer, Cristina Gutierrez, who spoke exactly the same way.


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2014: Eddie Needs A New Tuque
2013: Quickly Losing Count
2012: Opposites Don't Always Attract
2011: Shit Eating Grins. And Giggles. And Shits And Giggles.
2010: Waiting It Out
2009: My Life According To Sugarland
2008: EPCOT On Fire
2007: Eddie Full Of Turkey Friday
2006: Crouching Poultry, Hidden Turkey
2005: Is It Really A Sandwich?


TroyNtsn said...

Interesting, I wonder if it is how she avoids stuttering?

dlg said...

Thank goodness, she lost last night!

Ed said...

She kinda reminded me of Garth from Wayne's World: