Friday, June 15, 2012

Crash Test Dummy

My mother called today to give me the run down on her day. She was out and about running errands; picking up prescriptions at the pharmacy, stopping at the party store to get decorations for the Father's Day dinner she was preparing for my brother, hitting the grocery store to buy ingredients for said dinner, and then popping into Old Navy to get my brother a few pairs of the cargo pants he likes to wear for work.

That's where she was when she called me, Old Navy.

"Boy, I never realized all the great stuff they have in here." she said.

"I know." I said.

"And the prices are pretty reasonable." she said.

"Yeah, they have some cute stuff. They usually have an area in the back with clearance stuff too. But why are you in Old Navy??" I asked, since she never shops there.

"I came in to get your brother some of the cargo pants he likes." she said. "For Father's Day."

"Oh yeah, they're a good deal." I said.

"But you know, as I'm walking around, I was a little disoriented. When I came into the store it was very crowded, there were a lot a people right in the entrance from the mall. But it turns out a lot of the people were mannequins." she said.

"Yeah," I laughed. "That's kinda their thing. They use those mannequins in a lot of their commercials."

"Well, they startled me. As I was walking through the crowd, I bumped into one of them and it teetered. I reached out to steady it because I thought I bumped into an old lady, almost knocking her over.” she said.

“C’mon, really?? You didn’t know it was a mannequin?” I said.

“Well, you turn around and they’re right there. In fact, there's one standing next to me right now." she said.

"Standing next to you?" I said.

"Yeah. It's standing right next to me."

"Mom. The mannequin is not standing next to you. You are standing next to the mannequin." I said.

“It’s scary. You have to look at their face to know they’re mannequins. They're dressed in clothes and they look like people. It's creepy. I think it's a stupid thing to have in a store.” she said.

"Where should they be??" I asked.

"Well, it's one thing to have them in the window, but it's stupid to have them in the store next to the people shopping there." she said.

And there you have it, folks. These are the things my mother comes up with, on almost a daily basis. If she's not annoying me, she's making me laugh. And because I have a blog, I have the opportunity to share the story and possibly make other people laugh too.

I have to wonder though - what is she going to be like when she gets really old??


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2011:
No Fudd Found Near This Fountain
2010: The Very Thoughtful Man
2009: SPAM: Not The E-mail Kind
2008: How Casting A Memory Begins With A Fish
2007: A Weekend At The End Of The Rainbow
2006: If I Were In People Magazine
2005: Free Mudflap

3 comments:

Gil said...

All I can say is God Bless Her!!!

Belledog said...

I love that your mom gets out and about. (In the new Camry.)

When those mannequins start talking back to her, then you can worry.

Still can't send email! Although can receive it. Shall be in touch with you once the Mac problems are sorted out.

Best to you and Eddie.

Cheers.

Pat said...

I think your mom needs her own blog.