Monday, January 18, 2016

Fierce

Ed decided to pay Maezy a visit while she was lounging in her cozy little bed.

She looks mad, but she's not.  This is a yawn.

This is definitely going to be a slow week if we're starting with cat pictures.



~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: The Nuts And Bolts Of It

2014: Gorgeous, Rich, And Rugged. And That's Just The Bag.
2013: Back To Basics
2012: I Can Think Of Better Ways To Spend Hump Day
2011: Can I Appoint Myself The Baroness Of Cattle?
2010: This Time Losing The Wallet Really Means Losing The Wallet
2009: Marley & Me
2008: Eddie Gets Handy Friday
2007: The Perfect Neapolitan Slice
2006: The King Of The Flying Salmon
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Sunday, January 17, 2016

There Is Poetry In Change

This was my mother's living room.
She has since made it into her dining room.  Because the living room is longer than it is wide, it created sort of a weird space to create seating and she wanted something cozier.

The dining room table is so big in the smaller space, she thought switching the rooms would give her the cozy seating area she wanted, and the larger space she needed to extend the dining room table for family functions or lunches with her friends.

But because the living room had carpet, the chairs were impossible to move easily. And it was even more difficult for her friends, most of whom are in their seventies. So she decided to remove the carpet and have my brother and Ed tile the entire room, which they finished last week.

This is the result.

She loves it.
Living room sad. Need
space to please, table to feed.
Now I am happy.

That was a Haiku.




~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: Ski Or Sun? Sun Won.

2014: All The Better To Cook With, My Dear
2013: I Fancy The Castle Life
2012: There Are No Prison Blues If You Have Naan
2011: Now I’m No Longer Alone
2010: Rings Of Spring
2009: Map Schmap
2008: A Willow Weeps In Arizona
2007: Double Team
2006: Turning One Million
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Saturday, January 16, 2016

Please Come Back!

Maezy was stalking birds on the porch.  When I first saw her, she had both front paws up on the screen, spread out like she was going to scoop them up in her paws.  As they flew by she tried to move to follow their movement.

Her claw got stuck.  I watched her for a few moments thinking she'd get herself loose but she didn't seem able to get unstuck.

I opened to door to help her and just as I stepped on the porch, she got her claw unstuck and bolted across my feet.  The bird never came back.

There is always tomorrow.




~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: Still Life

2014: Sunset Cycling
2013: Pit Stop At Home
2012: Adding A Few More Wheels To The Big Rig
2011: Again And Again And Again
2010: Hood Ornament
2009: Eddie Out Of Control Friday
2008: My Boyfriend Simon Is Back In Town
2007: A Little Taste Of Miami Beach
2006: Ooooohhhhhh, Jabra!
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Friday, January 15, 2016

An Original Recycler

This is the interior of Bix Furniture Refinishing on 4th Avenue in Tucson, Arizona.  It was a very messy, but kind of cool store.  I've passed this store for years and never even knew it was occupied.  The front windows are covered in cobwebs, old dusty furniture stacked inside. It looked like a place forgotten. I had no idea it was actually open for business.

Ed and I visited her to get information on refinishing an old, dark stained dining table of my mother's into a beautiful, white, French country farmhouse-y dining table. The table is over 50 years old and made so well, it's worth preserving and restoring rather than buying something new.

The owner of the store - the one seated in the photo - was an interesting guy with a very eclectic style and some really good ideas. I'm thinking this is going to be a great option once a decision is made.



~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: There's A Black Hole In The Desert (With Truck Parking)
2014: Strength In Numbers
2013: Woman Cannot Live On Bread Alone
2012: Why Milk Is ALWAYS At The Top Of My Shopping List
2011: Fun For Sale
2010: Dublin Is Incredibly Corny
2009: Welcome To Snowhio
2008: When Big Hair And Denim Were King
2007: Open 24 Hours
2006: Lucky One Eye
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Truly A Man Of Leisure

Ed has been so relaxed while home that today when we went out, he wore his slippers.

To lunch, to my doctor's appointment, to shopping on 4th Avenue, to run errands.

It was not intentional.

I didn't notice until we were walking into the restaurant and I heard this soft swishing noise. I turned to see where it was coming from.  The noise led me to look at Ed's feet.  He was wearing slippers!

I said, "Baby, you're wearing your slippers."

He said, "Oh, shit." and we just looked at each other and laughed.  We were halfway to the door of the restaurant and too far from the house to go back, so we just shrugged and kept going. Was anyone really going to notice?

At least they didn't have bunny ears on them.




~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: Beer Run

2014: Field Two
2013: We Are A Very Rich, Blessed, Lucky, Fortunate Lot Aren't We?
2012: Passion Creates Pure Art
2011: Reflecting On The Day
2010: Crunching The Numbers
2009: Looking Grand At The Grand Canyon
2008: Overshadowing Government
2007: Miami International
2006: Did You Check The Solenoid?
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Shining A Light


I'm kind of on a YouTube kick this week and since I don't have anything to post about, here's another video.  I love Jill Scott and she does this song beautifully. She performed it at the Shining A Light concert.

Here are the lyrics to "Strange Fruit":


Southern trees bear a strange fruit
Blood on the leaves and blood at the root
Black bodies swingin' in the Southern breeze
Strange fruit hangin' from the poplar trees

Pastoral scene of the gallant South
The bulgin' eyes and the twisted mouth
Scent of magnolias sweet and fresh
Then the sudden smell of burnin' flesh

Here is a fruit for the crows to pluck
For the rain to gather, for the wind to suck
For the sun to rot, for the tree to drop
Here is a strange and bitter crop



~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: Tooling Around The Old Pueblo

2014: Next Blog, Please
2013: My Mother Never Fried Chicken Like This
2012: Shocking
2011: Awesome All-Star
2010: Have Pots And Pans, Will Travel
2009: This One Contains A Young Rider
2008: When She’s Not Sleeping, She Tries To Look Purty
2007: Eddie McSteamy Friday
2006: Pepparkakor Cat
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Monday, January 11, 2016

Sprouting The Good Stuff

Stocked up at Sprout's Farmers Market this week.  Got fruit, veg, yogurt, Dave's Killer Bread (my friends turned me on to this), and a bunch of other stuff.

Delicious food on the horizon!




~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: Economic Stimulation

2014: The Ninety-Two Year Old Horseman
2013: Where They Store The Crop Goodies
2012: Inside The Trucker’s Studio
2011: The Next Project
2010: Why Would You Want To Be A Zero When Looking Like This Is Clearly A Plus?
2009: The Giant Dirty Bird Goes Sailing In The Four Corners
2008: Soft Core Porn
2007: Almost Fully Integrated
2006: Downtown Scenery And Deals
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Sunday, January 10, 2016

My God, This Reminds Me Of Why I Love Adele


The only way you haven't heard of Adele's record-breaking comeback album 25 is if you've been living under a rock.

She hasn't had anything in three years.  The first single, "Hello" was met with critical acclaim. It sold close to 3.5 million copies its first week. To date, it's sold 15 million copies worldwide.

When "Hello" came out, people were in a frenzy. Adele fans were beside themselves. The Twittersphere went wild. Celebrities were crying.

And the song is good.  Great, even.  Hell, Adele is amazing.  I love everything that comes out of her mouth.  I haven't had a chance to listen to the entire album, uninterrupted. I played it in the car on our road trip back from New Mexico, and it's good, really good.  But I didn't listen the way I would have if I were alone.

Of what I did hear, I have to say that at this point my favorite song is not "Hello".

It's "When We Were Young". I've been playing it for days now.

Watch the video.



~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: Making Friends And Dinner Plans

2014: It's So EXHAUSTing Being Right All The Time
2013: A Marriage Of Two Loves
2012: I Love A Man Wearing A Damn Good Looking Workboot
2011: MMXI At Full Throttle
2010: Maybe There’s A Reason Ed Never Lets Me Out Of The Truck
2009: Napolitos
2008: Pull Up A Chair
2007: The Story Of The Uppity Barista: Otherwise Known As A Texan Gittin’ Above His Raisin’
2006: Rock, Paper, Eddie
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Saturday, January 09, 2016

Friday, January 08, 2016

Happy Fucking New Year

The waiting room at my internist's office
It all started this week with my doctor appointments. Since I knew we'd be home, I scheduled a mammogram and a follow-up visit with my general practitioner, who's an internist. May as well start the year off with a fresh health baseline, right?

The mammogram appointment was yesterday and I got an all clear - I always knew my boobs were worthy of a passing grade - and today I went to see my regular doctor to follow up on my September 2015 visit.  I also wanted to have a few new things checked out - my left ring finger that's crooking before my eyes, and I have a pain in my right elbow.

Remember how just 8 days ago I wrote about my health in #37 of my year-end meme?

Well, I spoke a little too soon, because January 8th will now be remembered as the date I got news I wasn't expecting and wasn't at all thrilled hearing. The report I got back from my blood work revealed results that demand I make some very big changes in my life. 
My doctor wanted me to lose ten pounds before I saw her again, and I did, so she was happy about that, but it's not enough. She wants more. 

Being a 48-year-old generally healthy fatty isn't going to cut it anymore.  I need to be wholly healthy and I have to lose weight. And I must exercise. Even just a little. The bike riding and walks that Ed and I have done in the past has to move from occasionally to regularly.

My doctor, a fit flame-haired Czech, understands the struggle. She comes from a family of fatties, even though she herself has a smokin' figure. She said she knows how hard it is to make good choices - she mentioned people bringing donuts to the office, donuts that call her name, loudly - but said she usually says no because she's already had breakfast. She said, "I want that donut, I really do. But I choose not to have it." 

It's going to be hard. And I'll tell you right now, I'm going to hate every fucking minute of it.  And you'll probably hear about it.  The changes to the eating won't be nearly as challenging for me as the exercise. That's just never been my thing.

Even when I was younger, I hated to move more than necessary. My brother and I would play catch - yes, catch, I even had my own really awesome leather baseball glove - but if missed the ball and had to go walk to get it, I'd be annoyed. When doing chores, I'd opt for the inside chores (because it was cooler inside) and trade my brother the ones that involved too much activity.  I'd do two of his for one of mine, that's how much I hated physical labor. I was a cerebral child and I'm a cerebral adult, manual labor is for other people.

To this day, when carrying groceries into the house from the car, I load myself up like a pack mule so I don't have to make more than one trip. I hate to park far away from any establishment. I about have a heart attack when walking in New York City with my friends Marlaina and MacG - seriously, they're fucking speed walkers. And if I have to make more than one trip because someone who was incompetent caused me to go back and forth - oh, like trying to find the doctor's office in a giant medical compound because the girl who gave me directions left out something important, like the building number - I get seriously irritated.  And it's not because I'm incapable of walking - hell, I walked all over Italy like a native - I just don't like it. And to have to do it as exercise, instead of for a purpose, like to get from point A to point B, is torture.

But that shit's gotta change. So, here's the plan:

MOVE
The plan for moving is to walk. It's the easiest thing to do and I don't need any special equipment.  I've got two legs and an iPod. Nothing else is needed. And I've got Ed - he said he'd help me with the exercise part.  And in the areas we can pull our bikes out, we'll do that, as I much prefer bike riding.

SIMPLIFY
The plan for food is to simplify. No sugar - meaning no added or obvious sugar. No white stuff - white bread, potatoes, rice, etc. No fast food - unless it's a grilled chicken salad. No lattes or my favorite General Foods International Italian Cappuccino drink. No Diet Coke - that's going to be a hard one. No junk food. No Dunkin' Donuts. No cheese danish at Starbucks. I don't want to use the trendy buzzword of "clean", but it seems like it's going to be sort of like that.

STOCK UP
What I will eat are fruit and vegetables, whole grains, legumes, Greek yogurt, lean protein, etc. The good thing about the food part is that I like almost everything. In fact, I love good food.  I grew up on it, never having anything packaged or frozen.  I don't have any food allergies and I'm not a picky eater, so there won't be many obstacles for me. There are foods I don't like but they're not essential nutrient foods that will be a problem if not eaten.

COOK SMART 
I will also have to make changes in the way I cook, like cutting down on the use of butter as a fat for 
sautéing and cooking. I use olive oil all the time, but I also use butter, and that part I need to limit. Also, I will have to watch the canned foods I use since they're high in sodium.  In the truck, although I buy plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables, I rely on canned goods because they're easy to stock and they're always available in a pinch. I've even resorted to using jarred pasta sauce because it's quick and easy. But many of these conveniences have added sugar and salt that I'd like to try to stay away from. So I'll be phasing those out.

DOWNSIZE
The biggest change with my eating will deal with portion sizes. I come from a family of giant portions. And no, my whole family is not fat.  My parents were always thin (although my mother is a bit of a butterball now, but she's 73 so I'm cutting her some slack), my brother is thin, my aunts and uncles are thin, my cousins are thin, my grandparents were thin...hey, wait a minute...could I be the milkman's kid?? OK, what I'm trying to say here is that although my family always ate big, for some reason it didn't cause them to be big. OK, I must be the milkman's kid.

Seriously though, I will limit portions sizes on the things that need limiting. I might OD on a head of cauliflower, but I don't think that's going to cause too much of a problem.

You know, even as I write this I'm not convinced I can do it. It's overwhelming and really feels like a daunting task. And the commitment? It's a big one. I always begin great, but I peter out. But now if I fail, I'll be doing it in front of tens of thousands of readers.

But you know what?  Failing doesn't even scare me. I'm not afraid of failing. It doesn't break me. And sometimes I think that might be a bad thing, because I think if you're afraid of failing you try harder so you don't fuck up.

I'm a very confident person, always have been.  And I've always liked myself, so I never felt as if failing at something had to do with me being the reason for the failure.  I never get down on myself. Even though I've failed miserably at dieting so many times in the past, I just kept trying thinking one day I'd get it.  Something would click.

While I was in the doctor's waiting room I read a TIME magazine interview with Adele where she was talking about how being a mother has given her purpose and how it makes her feel and she said, "He makes me so proud of myself, and he makes me like myself so much. And I've always liked myself. I've never not liked myself. I don't have hangups like that."


And I thought to myself, that's me. I've always liked myself, I've never not liked myself, and I don't have hangups like that. I've always felt beautiful, no matter what size I've been, and because I've always been healthy, I never gave the health thing a thought. But isn't that always the case?  Why think about something that's not a problem?

Well, you don't. Until it becomes a problem.


The doctor asked me a bunch of questions today, taking notes as I answered. Then asked, "When did this start?" - meaning the pain in the elbow, and the finger pain - and I had no idea. I said, "I really don't know. I'm never sick, I don't worry about anything, and I haven't documented any kind of changes because they haven't been significant enough for me to notice.  Until now.  So I guess I'd have to say sometime in the last year? Maybe six months?"

That's as specific as I could get. And that's why we're here.

I'm not turning this into a weight loss blog.  And I promise that you'll never see ONE recipe that includes kale. But I will write about what's going on. I got a real wake up call, a loud one, and it's time to take action.

I'm going to try to turn the sarcastic title of this post - Happy Fucking New Year - into an actual Happy Fucking NEW Year.

It seems fitting now, the word I chose in my 2015 year-end meme to represent 2016.

BLISS. That was my word.

When I looked up the meaning of the word, it said "perfect happiness, complete joy".

I think if I can make some progress with this, I have a pretty good chance at perfect health happiness and great body joy.

Monday is D-Day, folks.


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: Smart And Talented
2014: Who?
2013: Doing A Complete 180
2012: Apple Is My Life. I’m Living It To The Core.
2011: Men (And One Little Man) At Work
2010: Miss Me Like It’s Forever
2009: Speak Already!
2008: On The Hunt
2007: Cash For Life
2006: Nice Melons
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Thursday, January 07, 2016

El Niño Hits The Old Pueblo

Last January, on New Year's Day, we had snow in Tucson. Today when I went to pick up my nephews from school, we had more.

Early this morning as I headed to my doctor appointment, it was chilly but clear.  Two hours later the storm clouds were covering the city and the rain had started.  By 2:30 when I went to pick up my youngest nephew, the rain was coming down hard and the roads were flooding, as they're known to do here when we get a quick heavy rain.

By 3:00 the washes were running freely and I was actually a little concerned about how deep the water was getting and how fast it was flowing. The roads looked like our yard did a couple of years ago.

Then, less than a mile from our house as I pulled up to the high school, the snow was falling in big fat wet flakes. It didn't stick, but the roads a few miles north of us were a mess.

I was home from the school within the next fifteen minutes and the photo above was the view from the front yard - heavy, low clouds, and snow on the mountain.

The Weather Gods knew I was coming.




~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

2015: Cackling Is One Of The Rules
2014: Ugatz
2013: All The Better To See You With My Dear 
2012: Gratuitous Cute Dog Photo
2011: How To Kill Bees
2010: A Mirage Of Sorts
2009: Clouds Aflame
2008: When You Get One Like This, Don’t Let Him Get Away
2007: A Good Tipper Can Always Get Away With Being A Little Bossy
2006: Like Day And Night In Utah
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Wednesday, January 06, 2016

Prep Work

My brother, the tile guy, is tiling the living room in my mother's house and Ed will be helping him over the next few days.  Today was the tear-out.

Here's a picture of Ed, my brother, and my two nephews tearing out the flooring they found underneath the carpet. Next, they clean and prep it.


The tile goes down on Friday.



~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: 
Just A Pier

2014: Third Time Is Not A Charm
2013: A Sure Sign You're In A Truck Stop
2012: Waiting For The Bell To Ring
2011: You Don’t Need I.D. To Buy Booze If You Have One Of These In Your Pocket
2010: The Pros Slip In And Out With Ease
2009: Mine. All Mine.
2008: No, You Can’t Fly It
2007: Flying Parasols
2006: Seattle In Motion
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Tuesday, January 05, 2016

The Spirit Of The West

While in New Mexico I got to meet Ed's father's golfing buddy Charlie.

World War Two veteran, retired dentist, father of two doctors, and superior golfer. We chatted about Chicago (where he's from), trucking, my blog, old time celebrities and how he wound up in New Mexico for over sixty years.

He even brought a little breakfast to breakfast - a tortilla and pan-fried ham appetizer. He was happy, with a fun spirit, and really made for an enjoyable dining experience.

And, he treated us to our meal. How hospitable is that?



~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

2015: Our House, In The Middle Of Our Street
2014: I'm Pretty Sure I Was Born With One
2013: Gettin' The Juice To Stay On The Move
2012: Light On My Feet. Literally.
2011: We Got Smashed
2010: One Provides Light, The Other Just Stands There
2009: Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are!
2008: C’Mon In
2007: Eddie Hits The Bricks Friday
2006: Take It As It Comes
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Monday, January 04, 2016

Harmoniously Incorporated

Yesterday we took a little drive around town to see the murals that adorn the buildings of Carlsbad, New Mexico.

"A mural is any piece of artwork painted or applied directly on a wall, ceiling or other large permanent surface. A distinguishing characteristic of mural painting is that the architectural elements of the given space are harmoniously incorporated
into the picture." ~ Wikipedia

Carlsbad Caverns Postage Stamp at 1612 S Canal...


Old West Town at 307 W. Mermod...

Pecos River Flume with fisherwoman at 605 W. Mermod...


 Brantley Dam at 1330 W. Mermod...

 Local inhabitants through time at 418 W. Fox...

 Fiesta Drive-In with automobiles at 1038 N. Richards...

Natural Attractions at the Carlsbad RV Park and Campground at 4301 National Parks Highway...

 Bats Flying out of the Carlsbad Caverns cave at 1301 S. Canal...



~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: 
Buy Sandwiches

2014: A Room With A View
2013: Is The Coast Clear Yet?
2012: Why So Angry, Birds?
2011: One Hand In The Air For The Empire State
2010: Hitching A Ride From The Frying Pan Into The Fire
2009: Don’t Look AT Me Like That. No, Really. Don’t. You’re Making Me Melt.
2008: A Mid-Winter Pick Me Up
2007: I Can’t Take My Eyes Off Of You
2006: How To Get Rid Of Your Girlfriend
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005! 

Sunday, January 03, 2016

Where The Flamingos Survived A Blizzard

As you might imagine, I've been itching to see snow for months.  My dream finally came true in the form of a sizable pile of snow with a flamingo perched atop.

We are visiting Ed's parents in New Mexico, where they recently got a shitload of snow. So much snow that his parents got stranded two hours from their home on their way back from Dallas, and we had to delay our travel here for over a week as we waited for roads to be cleared and mountains to become passable.

The blizzard so devastating, the Governor declared a state of emergency, and the dairy industry lost more than 30,000 cows, half of them in an area that contains the top ten milk-producing counties and which produces 40 percent of the state's milk.

The wind created snow drifts as high as 14 feet, with the wind pushing the animals into fenced corners where they suffocate in the snow. The loss is so devastating to dairy farmers, that Texas Association of Dairymen's Executive Director said it will affect milk production for about a year.

Sadly, the cows didn't fare as well as the plastic pink flamingo.



~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: 
It's All In The Details

2014: You're Not Alone
2013: More Bling Than One Person Can Handle
2012: Instantly Tucson
2011: Start With An Ollie, Finish With A Shred And Grind
2010: Fire In The Sky
2009: Free Advertising For Erectile Dysfunction
2008: High Flame Toni
2007: Ripped From The Headlines
2006: Our Truck Looked Reallllly Good…
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!

Saturday, January 02, 2016

Down The Hatch!

Started in 1952 by Blake Chanslor as a small hamburger stand in Albuquerque, New Mexico, Blake's Lotaburger has grown to a regional chain with 77 locations - 74 in New Mexico, 2 in Texas, and one in Tucson, Arizona. We stopped at the one in Deming, New Mexico on our way to visit Ed's parents.

The burgers are cooked to order so you can't necessarily call it "fast food" - we waited about 10 minutes for ours to be cooked - we watched the woman at the grill making the burgers and dropping the fries as we stood at the counter.

The chain of burger stands help popularize the use of green chiles as a condiment on hamburgers. They were named "Best Green Chile Cheeseburger in the World" by National Geographic and the New Mexico Department of Tourism includes them on the Green Chile Cheesburger Trail.

They use Premium Angus Beef and 100% Mexico Hatch Valley Grown Green Chiles, which are registered by the New Mexico Department of Agriculture, packed exclusively for Blake's Lotaburger. I don't know if I would say this is the best burger I've ever had, but the green chiles are amazingly delicious and they elevate the taste of the burger enough to make it worth the trip.


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
2015: 
New Year Check Up

2014: Because...Perché No?
2013: The Big Little Giant
2012: All The Color I Need
2011: Bobbin’ Around The Neighborhood
2010: Getting Ready For Bathing Suit Season With Bananas
2009: Ed Happy Little Trees Friday
2008: Sorry, no post on this day.
2007: Forty Two Days
2006: I Should Have Never Had That Last Drink!
2005: Sorry, no post on this day. The blog didn’t start until May 2005!